Supporting children through school transitions: A guide for parents and carers
Updated August 2026 | Written with insights from Jess, therapist at Kids Inspire
Written for parents and carers, with insights that may also be useful for teachers, pastoral staff and other professionals supporting children and young people through times of change.
As September approaches, families everywhere are preparing for the changes a new school year can bring. For many children and young people, this means a big school transition, whether that's starting primary school, moving to secondary school, or stepping into sixth form or college.
These changes can bring excitement and new opportunities, but they can also feel daunting and overwhelming. Supporting children through school transitions is about helping them feel safe, understood and ready for what's ahead.
In this article, Jess, one of our therapists at Kids Inspire, shares practical advice for parents, carers and professionals on supporting children's emotional wellbeing during times of change.
Why school transitions can feel challenging for children
Change can be difficult for children of all ages. Even positive changes can bring feelings of worry, sadness or overwhelm.
School transitions often involve leaving behind familiar routines, friendships and environments while adapting to new expectations and experiences.
Supporting children through secondary school transitions
Jess, one of our therapists at Kids Inspire, reminds us that transitions mean letting go of what’s familiar:
“Children moving up to secondary school have often spent years feeling settled in primary school – they know their peers, their teachers, and their routines. Suddenly, they’re faced with new teachers, a much bigger building, different rules, and having to navigate from one class to another. For some children, this is a lot to take in and it can take time for them to feel settled again.”
Starting primary school
It's the same with starting primary school. Young children are not only adjusting to new routines, but also spending long days away from home and their families for the first time. They may be getting used to a new environment, meeting new teachers and making new friends. For many children, this can feel quite daunting.
Acknowledging your own feelings
Parents and carers may also find this transition emotional, as they watch their child gain independence and perhaps revisit memories of their own experiences at school. If your own school years were challenging, you may find that this influences how you feel about your child's transition.
It's completely natural to have mixed emotions during this time. Giving space to those feelings is important.
Finding small positives to share with your child can help them feel reassured and more confident about what's ahead.
Signs your child may be struggling
It’s normal for children to feel a little anxious or unsettled in the first weeks of a new school year. But how do you know when a child is finding things harder than expected? Supporting children with school anxiety often means spotting changes in behaviour early.
Signs to look out for:
becoming more withdrawn than usual
changes in appetite or sleep
showing higher levels of anxiety, anger, or frustration
spending more time alone than normal
Friendship struggles can also show up at lunch and break times, which are often the least structured parts of the day. Talking with your child about how those times are going can give you clues about how well they’re settling in socially.
Helping children adjust to a new school year
“It’s important to let your child know that you are there to listen.”
In the run up to September and the first day back, children often have questions or worries. Your child might be feeling sad about what they’ve left behind, while also feeling nervous about the unknown of what’s to come.
Making space for these conversations is key. Some children may want to talk about their worries, while others might find it easier to draw or write them down. Checking in regularly helps you both notice which worries come and go, and gives opportunities to work through them together.
Practical ideas to help:
focus on the positives such as new friends, new subjects and growing independence
help children stay connected with friends from their previous school or nursery where possible.
Talk through new expectations and school rules
identify trusted adults they can turn to if things feel difficult
prepare uniforms and equipment in advance.
create a memory book to celebrate what they've enjoyed and help ease the transition.
use a visual timetable to introduce new routines.
Building confidence and independence
Transitions are also a chance to help children grow in confidence. Jess explains:
“Work with your child on what they feel ready to do independently and set small goals together. Start with little steps and build it up so their confidence can grow.”
For older children, that might mean:
arranging to meet friends after school within agreed boundaries
walking part of the way to school on their own
The important part is to show that you’re there for them, while giving them safe opportunities to build their independence and confidence.
At the end of a busy school day, remember that some children need time to unwind before talking. Giving them space to reset first can help conversations feel more open and positive.
When to seek additional support
Most children will settle into new routines in time, but some may continue to feel overwhelmed.
If you’re worried, Jess encourages starting with the school and speaking with teachers or pastoral staff to see if there’s any extra support that can be offered.
“Letting your child know that they’re not alone, and that you’re alongside them through this time, can make a big difference.”
If worries continue and are affecting sleep, appetite, confidence or friendships, it may be worth seeking additional help.
That could mean talking to a GP, school counsellor, or another trusted professional. While Kids Inspire is one source of support in Essex and Suffolk, we encourage families to reach out for the help that feels right for them.
Every child’s journey is different
Every child responds to change differently. For some, transitions will be smooth; for others, it may take more time and patience.
Children who are neurodivergent, or who have additional needs, may find changes to routine especially difficult, and may need extra support and understanding.
What matters most is that children feel safe, seen, and supported - whether that’s by parents, carers, teachers, or other professionals in their lives.
“These changes can feel overwhelming, but with encouragement, patience, and the right support, children do find their way.”
We’re thinking of all the children and young people starting a new academic year.